D1: Hello Damien...
D2: Hello? Who is this?
D1: Damien, don't be alarmed... I want you to listen to me carefully Damien.
D2: What are you talking about ... how did you get this number?
D1: Damien... listen to my voice, damien... who do you think this is?
D2: Ohh... gosh ... oh wow... is this Eddie McGuire?
D1: No, damien, it isn't.
D2: Well, I give up then.
D1: Damien... I am you ... I am yourself calling you from ten years in the future.
D2: NO WAY
D1: Yes way, Damien. Yes way.
D2: Get out of town!
D1: Shut up damien. Do you understand what I am telling you...
D2: This is AMAZING
D1: Yes. It is amazing. I imagine you have many questions...
D2: Oh god yes! Like oh... ok, how about this... who wins this season of masterchef?
D1: Is that a serious question?
D2: No... well, i mean, I was just wondering...
D1: Alright, fine, Po wins, now, I have important information for you...
D2: Fuck off. Po? Are you SERIOUS! That BEGGARS BELIEF!
D1: Damien, the only thing that beggars belief here is your stupidity. I am calling from the FUTURE! I can tell you anything. Do you have any other questions?
D2: Ummm... well... oh. No. Not if you're going to be like that.
D1: Sighhhh... Alright, I'm sorry I shouted at you. What's your question.
D2: No... you'll just say it's silly.
D1: I've said I'm sorry, ask the question.
D2: Alright... well, I've always wanted to know the collective noun for ostriches.
*click*
*Ring ring*
D2: Hello?
D1: Damien, it's me again, I'm sorry I lost my temper. I've calmed down and I realise what I have to say is more important than...
D2: Is that you Eddie?
*click*
So this can end here or it can go further. I feel like it is building up to something that doesn't really ever happen. I do like the idea of someone talking to themselves from the future and just giving really weird/specific advice or something. Maybe the Damien from the future would end up hating himself so much that he gives his past self some advice that would get him killed... Sorry that this is a cop out in that there is no real ending... I wasted a lot of time on a sketch about the tour de france that really didn't go anywhere at all, then I watched Jean Claude Van Damme in 'Time Cop' and wrote this...
I like the idea that the future version of Damian would be so disgusted with his past self that he says "goodbye Damian" and slits his own throat. This SHOULD make "Damian from the present" aware of when he is going to die (10 years) and how. This allows for humour in representing that he does not in fact understand, a question where he shows that he is worried about the future and about his health and completely oblivious that his future self has just killed himself.
ReplyDeleteHmmm im not sure whether that makes sense... its getting late and I got to finish my own sketch. I really like the concept. Even though I dont know what beggars belief is.